Sabrina morning talk..

Sabrina & I got to talking about her future because she started out asking if I missed her Grandma & Papa.  "Because they're your mommy and daddy."  I answered her, and she said that when she was grown up she would have her own mommy and daddy....?  Hmm, I replied, "Well I've had the same parents my whole life.  You know, your Dad and I will be your mom & dad your whole life too."  Which brought us to...

Sabrina:
"Someday I'm going to get married." 
Me:
"Are you going to have kids."
"Yes, 1,2,3. 3 kids."
"What will their names be?"
"Arizona, Philip and Sarah"
Later amended to...
"Arizona, Philip, and Morgan." "Morgan's my friend"
Boys or girls or both?
1 big girl, 1 big boy, then 1 little girl.
Ahhh...
What kind of house will you live in?
Green.
Later amended to
Blue.
What will you do for work?  You can be a doctor, a scientist, a nurse, a police woman, a fire woman, anything you want!
I'll be a doctor, because I've ALWAYS wanted to be a doctor. (Emphasis here on always, despite the fact that we know she's only 3.)
Will you take care of grownups or kids?
Grownups.
Will you be a doctor who helps you when you are sick or a doctor you visit to have surgery, when they cut you and stitch you up?
Both. 
What if you could only be one type?
Both.
OK. :)  Where will you go to vacation? The beach or the mountains.
Oh the beach, we will have a blue house on the beach.  Maybe I'll have six kids....
How will you pay for six kids?
I'll be a doctor. (She shrugged here)

Ok, bun, good talk.  We've got to let Stella outside now, it's been a while she's been making noise.
OK, Mommy! (Smile, kiss, hug.)

Ahhhh... I'm so glad Philip worked last night so SBJ and I could have this talk today.  Love spontaneous talks with my grown up gal.

Meanwhile, Samuel slept in until 8. 8! Seriously... maybe he's growing!??

Sabrina & Samuel... life in motion!

One of Samuel's favorite current moves is to yell as loud as he can 'Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!' Then when you look over at him (with a smile, who can resist?) he responds ha ha ha ha in his gurgly way. It's pretty cute. That & his mad dash to the fridge anytime the door opens. He most favors the light ranch dressing bottle in the door, and just this morning he decided it would be a great idea to try and sit in the nice cool fridge. He couldn't understand why he kept sliding down! (condensation.)

He stopped crawling last week. By Wednesday he decided even the shortest little moves around were better to walk than to crawl. Hard to believe I've seen his last uber motivated, army man style crawling, bam bam bam as fast as he can! No more! :( Kind of sad to gain & then lose these little signs of babyhood. Now it's official... toddler times!

Sabrina delights us with her conversation. Yesterday she explained so many things to her uber dense parents, thank goodness! She's getting really good at describing her world, things that she does out of your sight, but still messes up words & switches things around enough to be totally adorable & charming. It still makes me laugh & smile when she is blunt with us, or tries out a new word, getting it 60% right! Sabrina totally loves her brother soooo much, she gives him big hugs & takes every opportunity she can make up to pick him up and move him around our house. MOst of these moves elicit more AAAAAAaaaaah sounds out of Samuel. He's definitely figured out he has a say so in what happens, and has decided to share his opinions with a yell or a few cries whenever he is unpleased with an outcome. We can also tell, when they are out of sight by his yell when Sabrina's got him in a squish hug, him on top of her while she's laid down with him. Usually he's had just about enough, and yells to be freed. Sometimes Sabrina needs to be encouraged to let him go though, as she can't get enough! :) I was creating some decorations with scissors yesterday for Samuel's party, and she decided she needed to contribute as well. She used her pattern scissors to cut blue confetti for the party. Then she colored the confetti with hot pink, and used the glue to attach it all to a piece of paper. With one Belle sticker added to the top, her masterpiece was complete. She was at it again this morning, creating another gift for Samuel. She asked me, aren't I sweet to make this for Samuel's party?? Yes, honey, you are! :)

She is very concerned with Samuel's well being. I'll ask her to watch him when I leave the room, and she'll say yes Mommy I've got him! Then other times she'll say you can go now Mom, I'm watching Samuel, I'll keep him safe! Ha! To be truthful, she is absolutely our early detection/Samuel warning system. Mommmy/Daddy, Samuel's got the water cup! Mommy, Samuel's trying to go in the laundry room She takes unsafe objects/chokeables from him. Ok, this is making us sound unsafe, but it can be really hard to keep coins from falling out of pockets, fuzz from making tiny balls - and Samuel thinks anything smallish should be tried out for taste! Ewww... I know but we are so used to it by now, we just have to vacuum & sweep all the time. STill, you wouldn't be able to tell! ;)

Sabrina is 100% on top of the party planning for Samuel's first. She gets updates daily on how far away the party is (2 wks, 1.5 wks, 1 wk). She is probably the most excited person in the house. I get it too, who wouldn't be with all of her favorite friends coming? I'm pretty sure she has forgotten it is for his birthday and not hers, but that's ok right? We are thrilled to have so many of our loved ones come and join us in celebration. Sabrina is going to be over the moon, at 200% energy, and probably will crash hard for bed that night. Samuel will be his normal happiness, wondering who the heck all these people are... Don't worry son, you just didn't know how many people love that you are part of this big world! And they all are behind you and your family! We are so so blessed.

Philip, Sabrina, & Samuel Swingtime

Samuel is 11 months

Eleven months ago I was sitting here at WF, wondering when my sweet angel boy would arrive. A week late, he came finally, with a rush, to the song Superman. I think I've rarely seen Philip more overjoyed, or more in love. Instant love. Of course, he was beyond beautiful.... Samuel is our totally wonderful, happy, playful, imitator. He laughs and crawls so motivated to get at his object. He's walking 5-8 feet now on his own, and we'll clap for him when he reaches his destination. At our claps, he'll turn with a huge open mouthed grin and clap for himself as well. He loves, loves, his big sister. Nothing is cooler than playing with her while she's playing with...anything. For Sabrina, sometimes this is a good thing, and other times then drives her batty! They do not have the same playing style, for sure. However, they have been caught voluntarily playing ball together lately... It's pretty awesome. It really doesn't seem like it has been almost a year since he joined our family officially. In other ways, it is hard remembering life before our handsome love bug entered. I'm sure if I have trouble with that, Sabrina can't remember pre-Samuel life at all. She is in a stage where she likes to sit with me (on me) all the time. She can barely restrain herself from pushing Samuel off. It's so funny, since she really hasn't sat on my lap regularly since she was probably his age. While she's intensely affectionate, she has never tolerated smothering, long term cuddling, or seem to want any of that. But now she does, and so does Samuel. It makes me wish I was a taller person with more surface area to share. ;)

Sabrina is extraordinarily confident. She shows no fear of making friends or being in a new environment. The idea of going anyplace new is totally exciting and thrilling to her, eliciting yelps of joy and impatient nagging. It's hilarious. What? Where are we going? THE CARWASH??? WOW!!! Let's go, now, now, hurry.... ;) Philip and I joke that Samuel should model, and Sabrina is destined for drama/acting school. Yesterday I was leaving for Bible study, said all my goodbyes/hugs/kisses, then found Sabrina sitting in her rocking chair blocking the front door. Sabrina, could you please move? Nope, she replied, shaking her head matter of factly. Seriously, her tone was so perfect. It was too funny. Daddy intervened, taking care to remove her and set me free. We both chuckled as I kissed her one last kiss before heading out.

It is so hard leaving them every day, and so great to come home. Well, yesterday could have been better, but Philip and I had some laughs over dinner. Both kids had skipped afternoon naps, and by 6pm, it was so very apparent. We dined with tears/whining from both kids alternating, and sometimes overlapping. We joked about how it was just another family meal at the Johnsons, when Sabrina shed tears for the third time over some crazy tiny wrong dinner detail. There is a reason the family series National Lampoon exists, after all... it can really resemble my life at times!

Thought of another one

While tugging my arm and saying Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, feed me, feed me. I told her I would finish my last 2 bites of dinner & then assist her. I completed my dinner while she continued to tug on my arm and incessantly repeat Mommy, Mommy.

I then turned to her and said, "Thank you for waiting so patiently Sabrina, I'll feed you now."

She paused, then turned to me while the fork was suspended in midair, "But Mommy, I wasn't patient. I was tugging on your arm like this...!" :) Somebody definitely knows what patient means! ha ha!

Favorite mispronounciations:

Feather for Heather

Cabloon for balloon

nilk for milk

stoy tory for Toy Story

movers teater for Movie theatre

Sam's now arching his back a lot, I think he wants to roll over to his tummy sometime soon. We'll have to wait & see!

Goodness, life changes.

Sabrina recent quotes:

"Mommy, you're the best Mom I ever seen!"

"DDaddy, I'm going to be a doctor and fix your arm." (Arm in cast from crazy wreck.)

"God bless Daddy and Mommy and Samuel and Guinness and Mommy and Daddy."

After seeing Nemo, (who tells his daddy he "hates" him), Sabrina tries the word out saying "Mommy, I hate your husband," while laughing. This sounds harsh but when I asked her what hate means she says it means time out & asks why Nemo said that to his Daddy. Anyhow, it was random & curious.

Sabrina loves Samuel and tries really hard to get things for him, help change diapers, sing, and talk to him. We are so proud when she holds him, feeds him a bottle, and loves on him.

Of course there is the occasional (while yelling in his face), "No Mom he's not sleeping!"

Samuel is such a joy. He's a good sleeper, regularly sleeping from 9 or 11pm-4am. He can regularly roll over from his belly to his back, but it still surprises him. He is such a laugher - he loves giggling at the 'whoa' game where we raise him up over our heads and lower him down to our faces & also when we play peekaboo. He is a talker too. He loves to have your attention and gurgle, blow bubbles, and make sounds 'goo', 'ah', 'oooo' at us. He likes to answer whatever questions we ask him.

I love to sing Bible songs to him, and Sabrina's at an age that she is starting to sing them with me & learn the words. She knows most of her long night night prayer, and also leads us in the meal blessings. It's been great to see her pick up & memorize prayers & songs. I guess it is time to try for Bible verses? Not sure how to do that, but I imagine it is possible.

I went back to work last Monday, and it is very surreal. After some initial awkwardness, I'm settling in again & have resumed normal quick lunches with Pops & Kim, which feels very normal. I have moved and have new neighbors now. Closer to Kim & the kitchen which is nice since I have a couple of pumping breaks a day. I miss sitting across from Nichole though, she's on the other side of my cube wall now & it is a bit more of an effort to visit now since I can't see her... Man, pumping is not a pleasure. It does feel good to know I'm providing for Samuel & giving him the best that I can. I know I'll just have to push on through, and there are many months to go.

It's hard to shake the feeling that I'm going do this for a bit (work) & then get to come home again and be with the babies once more. I know this isn't the case, so it is hard to grasp why I have that feeling. Probably just misplaced optimism. :)

Just a little bit more...

This weekend while we were driving back from seeing Berk, her brother Rob, and an expectant Laura (YEA!), Sabrina and I SANG together! I'd sing a few words, and she'd sing them back. We got through 2-3 songs and it was sooooo cool. Natalie called during our rendition of the BIBLE song. :) Miss Nat so much, wish we could see her more. Looking forward to her life when she gets finished with her MBA in March & hoping we will be together more after that.

Tonight Sabrina entertained us at dinner, as usual, and at one point during a particularly difficult episode of trying to convince her to eat yellow squash, I completely lost my composure and dissolved into giggles. I just lost it, and had to stop talking so I could recover. Then I continued attempting to convey to her the seriousness of trying everything on her plate. :) Somehow I think she'll live without that bite of squash...As I remember, she wouldn't eat it as a little tiny baby either. And she was a baby who'd eat everything! (almost)

After dinner, she proved to be the the best little helper girl! I was moving wet clothes from the washer to the dryer, and she stood in front of the driver to receive. Then she'd take the wet clothes and add to the dryer. I really thought she would tire of the game quickly, but she stood there and kept working until the washer was empty. I was so proud of her for helping me. And doing it without me asking her to! In truth, if I had asked her to, there is no way she would have, being firmly in the land of No, no!!! :)

Then she came out to play with her puzzle pieces for a while. After a little bit, she rose up and headed to the laundry room. For some reason, this attracted both Philip's and my attention, because there really isn't anything in there but dog beds and stuff to high up for her to reach. That is nothing but.... brooms and mops! Sure enough, she walked back out with her play broom in hand and went to work attempting to sweep up some of the stuffing out of Zeus' newest demolished toy! How cute is that??? Now, she wasn't really that effective with her sweeping, but we loved the sentiment!

I promise you she gets sweeter, funnier, and more precious by the day. We never know what to expect, and that's 99% of the time a really cool thing.

That's it for now!